about "The Best Comic Strip Ever!"

The characters in my strip, set in Africa's Western Rift Valley, are: the Foolish Pride of lions (Leon, the haughty and lethargic King of Beasts; his queen, Leona; and their cub Lionel, an unpromising heir to the throne); Secretary Bird, a liason between the Royal Court and the rest of the animals; cerebral, man-imitating Ape, a reader of the Substandard; peevish Rhinoceros; harmless but senseless Ostrich; Crocodile, resident of the much-frequented Watering Hole, and his dentist, Crocodile Bird; Honey Badger (alias Ratel), the "Meanest Animal in the World", and his one associate, Honeyguide; Mumbo the elephant, a descendant of Jumbo and a butt of jokes about his weight and the size of his ears and nose; Duncan the dung beetle; ill-favored and unwashed Warthog; the craven, henpecked male and shrewish female hyaenas, both of them foul-smelling and perpetually at war vs. the lions; the mistaken-identity-plagued zebras; slow and superannuated Tortoise; Oxpecker, a companion of large herbivores; Hugh the chamaeleon; and walled-up Mrs. Hornbill.

The Best Comic Strip Ever!

If you "click" the present cartoon, whizbang technology will take you to the "The Best Comic Strip Ever!" Archive.



30 May 2012

Uncommon Commentary #269: What's Truly Broken Is the Record for "Worst President"

It is inaccurate to say, as, e.g., Democrats do when things don't go their way, that "the [US political] system is broken".  It's not that I think that this system works--see UC #241, and below--; it's just that to say that something is broken is to imply that, if repaired, it would work.  What I (at the risk of shocking the reader) contend is that what we call "democracy" is intrinsically unworkable, because it's based on the false premise that the average member of our fallen human race is qualified to choose his leaders.  In my opinion, both history and common sense demonstrate that people in general are too selfish and ignorant to vote wisely.
(Anyway, if President Obombast really wants the people to believe that "the system is broken", why doesn't he offer them evidence for his assertion, such as the fact that they elected
him to our highest office?)

25 May 2012

Uncommon Commentary #268: Don’t Be Afridi Cat; to Rescue Shakil Would Be a Slam-Dunk

(I admit that I may be going too far, using two puns in a single title.)
US non-military foreign aid ought to be abolished, and Pakistan's imprisonment of Dr. Shakil—which would be a correct way for "Shaquille" O’Neal to spell his first name—Afridi, who helped us find Usama bin Laden, provides us with a clear opportunity to sever our assistance to that country in particular.  I do not, however, agree with those who want this termination to include our millions of dollars in "counterinsurgency aid"; after all, it's in our own interest as well as theirs for the Pakistani government to continue to fight militants.  What we ought to do is threaten to put an end to that funding, as leverage to persuade the Pakistani administration to release the man into our custody.  To simply cut off Pakistan without a cent might satisfy the urge felt by many to "punish" that state, but would do nothing to free Afridi.

20 May 2012

Uncommon Commentary #267: Giving New Meaning to the Term “Dumb Show”

On several occasions, the cable television network Planet Green has broadcast a program titled The Da Vinci Shroud.  Curious as to what on Earth it might be about, I went to the capsule description, which reads: "Experts examine if the Shroud of Turin could be the work of Leonardo Da Vinci."  I've heard very many stupid things, but this may belong in the Top Ten.  There is more evidence for the authenticity of the Shroud of Turin (which is thought, correctly, to be the burial shroud of Christ) than for the guilt of most men executed for murder, but even persons who consider this relic a forgery think that the forgery took place in the High Middle Ages (ca. 1000-1300), centuries before the birth (1452) of Da Vinci.  Needless to say—Although if that's true, why am I saying it?—I didn't watch.  Planet Green will change its identity on Memorial Day, but it's possible that The Da Vinci Shroud will air somewhere else, hence this uncommon commentary's reason for being.  If it does come on, I strongly advise you to turn to some other channel; even a "reality" show would be preferable to that absurdity.

19 May 2012

Uncommon Commentary #266: And Just Think: the Naming of Our Capital for Washington Was Intended to Honor Him

In a country where no one votes, there is no vote fraud; if there are no candidates for office, there are no candidates to slander their opponents.  (Further, as this past week's training session for the US House of Representatives' Democratic Caucus demonstrates, this slander doesn’t always happen spontaneously or on the politicians' initiative.  Sometimes, the Party hires a person like Maya Wiley, of something called the Center for Social Inclusion, to instruct office-seekers to bring race into debates on issues that have nothing to do with race.)  A lack of elections is typically ranked among the worst characteristics of a non-constitutional monarchy, but campaigning here in the "democratic" USA, especially that presently being carried out by the incumbent president and his myrmidons, shows that it may actually be one of the best.

18 May 2012

Uncommon Commentary #265: Persecution by Prosecution?

In February, around the time when Emperor Nerobama appeared at the University of Miami, a Miami-Dade Community College student named Joaquin Amador Serrapio, Jr., made Facebook postings against him; according to an Associated Press item, one post "threatened to put a bullet in the president's head"—At least then he’d have something in his head!—and another "asked if anyone wanted to help with a presidential assassination".  I don't say that he did the right thing, but as the AP article admitted that there is "no indication Serrapio intended to act on the threats", does he really deserve a possible prison term (for a maximum of five years)?  He has requested a change of his plea to "guilty"; if the change is allowed, then there must be a sentence, but it ought to be suspended, as should the legal career of whoever brought charges against him.

17 May 2012

Uncommon Commentary #264: A Poll-ish Joke

An Obombast campaign deputy-manager has rejected the 15 May public-opinion survey conducted jointly by CBS and the New York Times, in which two-thirds of the respondents regarded the President as having had largely political motives for coming out in favor of same-sex marriage; she said "the methodology was significantly biased" and "It's a biased sample, so they re-biased the same sample".  I'll bet that you expected never to see the day when a leftist would acknowledge the presence of prejudice in the mainstream news media!

11 May 2012

Uncommon Commentary #263: Why Can't it Be These Banks That Fail?

Sperm banks often present their business as noble dedication to the cause of reproductive fertility; the idea is that a woman whose mate is unable to father offspring can avail herself of donated sperm to produce a child who is half theirs, which, as the theory goes, is better than having none. There are, however, several moral problems with this.
God did not intend that the means of sexual reproduction should become items of commerce, or that women should bear children that are begotten by men other than their husbands.
Masturbation is almost certainly necessary to make a donation, since it's hard (if amusing) to imagine someone interrupting sexual intercourse to fill a vial or some other such receptacle. Moreover, in degenerate modern civilization, which has removed the stigma from unwed motherhood, many a woman undoubtedly makes use of such facilities to try to conceive the child of her dreams (see the next paragraph) without having to marry anyone. We don't need sperm banks to advance the cause of sexual immorality; we have public schools and mass media.
A recent news item, concerning the fact that a sperm bank in Denmark will accept no further contributions from redheads, demonstrates that use of such institutions can be a form of genetic engineering. Donors to the California Cryobank [sic] have to meet such requirements as being above average height and be either holding or working toward a bachelor's (or higher) degree; potential stud bulls must also answer questions about their hair color, eye color, ethnic origin, &c.
Finally, why resort to such a process when there are so many children awaiting adoption? A couple may consider it a misfortune that they cannot reproduce without outside help, but they can change their misfortune into good fortune for an orphan, by giving him a loving home.

06 May 2012

Uncommon Commentary #262: Obama bin Laden

The subject of Vital Link #4 brings to my mind two questions:
1) Since Anwar al-Awlaki was a US (as well as Yemeni) national, why didn't we attempt a raid, like that which had taken out foreigner Usama bin Laden, to seize him if possible?  Is it for the same reason why we now make little if any effort to capture non-citizen terrorists, namely, that President Yo'Mama (see the list of domanisms) doesn't want his administration to have to decide whether to hold civilian trials or military tribunals? (According to Leon Panetta, Navy SEAL Team Six members were expected to try to take bin Laden alive if they did not further endanger their own lives in doing so; it has, however, become hard to avoid suspecting that al-Qaeda's chief was spared death-by-drone only because the walls of his compound shielded him from such an attack.)
2) Isn't our chief executor—I mean, executive's—current disregard of Pakistani sovereignty an instance of "unilateralism", which he condemned when allegedly practiced by his predecessor?

05 May 2012

Uncommon Commentary #261: I Wish that We Could Fast-"Forward" Through the Rest of His Presidency

Republicans are ridiculing President Obombast's re-election campaign slogan, "Forward", but they ought to mind two of my dictionary's definitions for this word as an adjective: 2b, "lacking modesty or reserve", and 5b, "extreme, radical".  Don't these apply quite well to the False-Messiah-in-Chief?

04 May 2012

Vital Link #4

I recommend very little written by anyone other than I, but an opinion piece called The President's Private War is too important to miss. (You may want to read it in conjunction with the second, fourth, and perhaps fifth paragraph of this article, which testifies to the extent of military involvement in an operation that many consider to be exclusively civilian, and thus not covered by the War Powers Act.)  Before reading it, I deemed the conducting of the drone campaigns in Asia one of the thimbleful of things done by President Yo'Mama (see the list of domanisms) that are not to his discredit; it may change your mind, too.

02 May 2012

Uncommon Commentary #260: Did I Say "If"? I Meant "When" I Rule the World

On the topic of whether sale of alcoholic beverages should be licit on Sunday, the key word is not "alcoholic" but "Sunday"; with a few obvious exceptions, nothing ought to be sold on the Lord's Day, since such financial transactions violate the Fourth Commandment (or the Third, if you're a Lutheran or a Roman Catholic).  If I ruled the world, people would be prohibited from conducting business on their Sabbath, and so Jews (including those only nominally Jewish) would be permitted to buy and sell on Sunday but not from sundown Friday to sundown Saturday, and Christians (including, as with Jews, those who don't live their ostensible religion) would be allowed to do so on any day but Sunday.  Avowed pagans and atheists would not be a factor, because there wouldn't be any.